Jesus is rizen-ed

Jesus will return on the Raptor!

He told this guy I know to tell someone entirely oblivious to me, kind of like a preacher, to email me about it with the explicit instructions that it end up in my spam folder. After a few months, I read it and it told me the truth.

Not proof enough for you?

God appeared to Mr. Oblivious in a dream. With a gasp, god entered into his soul. They softly spoke of a green lizard for which Jesus would mount and ride unto the ends of the earth, his name, "Steve". In spurts and stutters he sss-ssp-spo- sp... er, talked of this dream in which Jesus, and the dinosaur would come and show everyone the truth. In this magnificent moment Jesus would say, "Religion is bullshit."

Some say I made it all up. Maybe I did, but what if I didn't?